I am absolutely upset, and angry, at the fact that this Chandon, a Minister at the Highest Court of Justice in Brazil has not been able yet to learn sufficient English to decypher my invitation to your Goodself to grace my presidential inauguration, upcoming 20th January ...

I'll give an ultimatum here: should I not get a positive reply within 24 hours I'll send in the Marines under the captaincy of my trustworthy friend, Stormy Daniels.

Pest regards, Donaldito